"I wanna show you my new bean-bag punch"
Unlike the disgracefully bad Orks! Frogs (imdb) actually delivers what it promises: Frogs.
Actually this cautionary tale of ecological disaster (and nature's revenge) trades in all manner of beasts including snakes, alligators, birds, lizards, spiders and crabs... yes, crabs.
Freelance photographer (Picket Smith) has discovered ecological devastation in the swamp lands surrounding the gaudy old homestead of millionaire Jason Crocket. It seems that in addition to emptying out his shit pipes and rubbish bins into the waterway old Crocket has been poisoning the wildlife - especially the frogs who seem to be multiplying at an alarming rate.
Crafty old Picket Smith utilizes some sexual tension formed with Crocket's daughter to his advantage; he spends a day or two at the mansion and snoops around for answers. Pretty soon people start getting picked off one by one by the Frogs and co. By the end of the weekend it's utter frog carnage.
Its hilarious to see how unrealistic some of these frog murders really are, their level of cunning and intelligence extending to apparent reading abilities at one stage. This one also gets a massive points bonus for actors getting snakes, spiders, frogs etc thrown all over them. That is after all, what we paid for.
Fair warning however. As is to be expected from this era there is little regard for the well being of the actual frogs. And whilst the scenes of actual animal deaths are (thankfully) few and far between there are some moments where the line between exploding rubber snake exploding real snake is a blurry one indeed. In this spirit I find the alligator finale is best put out of mind entirely in this post film wrap-up.
If you can get past these dubious ethical considerations and you enjoy a bit of animal flingin' action you can do a lot worse than FROGS.
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