Housekeeping 29 Jan 2011: Postal Tubing

 



















When it comes to housekeeping we all have to chip in and here at BMovie Cheese were not adverse to a little toilet cleaning. God knows the bowl gets a pounding.

So yeah.
 

SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT - review by The Snout

"Santa Claus is going to bring you a big surprise tonight, you just wait and see"

Ho, ho, ho. I'd be jovial too if I could run around dressed as Santa with a fuck-off axe.

 Look, I love my 80's schlock, shock horror movies as Grizzly can attest.
(read: Alligator) and I was hoping for so much more when viewing this.....

Thanks to Griz, I picked this one up in the mail the other day. My night consisted of the usual ritual of watching a new horror flick. And that was to:
1. Drink beer
2. Read the back of the DVD cover multiple times
3. Drink some more beer
4. Fluff up a comfy pillow
5. See if I have anymore beer in the fridge (and I did have)
6. Start getting excited about watching said movie
7. Wait for the missus to go to bed
8. Tell her to get me a beer on her way to bed
9. Kick back and enjoy
And again, I followed this to a tee.

GINGERDEAD MAN - review by Grizzly

"Hey rat! I'm talking to you - want a piece of me? Hey you little shit - Fuck off!!!"

Firstly... allow me to summarize the first four minutes of Gingerdead Man (imdb):

ZOMBI 3 - review by Grizzly



"Why don't you go clean room four, there's a disgusting smell in there" 


I'm pretty easy to please.

Give me something with "Zombi" at the start and a number on the end.

SLIME CITY - review by Grizzly

"Nicole practices voodoo as hard as she does fellatio"

The 80's was all about slime.

This kind of slime:

Slime is the staple of B-movie cheese. It comes out of mouths in a vomitous form, it drips down walls in haunted places, rubber monster-suit men leave it in a trail to the sewer (and upon the boob), it's the by-product of a magic spell, a sentient-like outer-space evil attached to your face. And if you get it on you - you will mutate. Guaranteed. You will mutate like a mother-fucker.

But what is slime?