This page is where you can ask Grizzly Porkiff about horror movies and he will answer them as best he can.
If you would like to ask Grizz a horror movie question, please fill out the form below to send your question.
Replies shall appear in red.
Replies shall appear in red.
Question from Muzz-man in Hungary:
"Dear Grizz,
Why don't Zombies climb up drain pipes? You see, they can break through glass and walk up stairs, surely they can climb up drain pipes to get to the survivors on the roof?"
Fuck off.
Question from Prince Adam from Castle GreySkull:
"Dear Grizz,
I really like Linnea Quigley but I think that Barbara Crampton is hotter. Do you think you could organise a three-way with Linnea, Barbara and Lephrechaun?"
Your a regular funny guy aren't you Prince Adam? I tell you how its gonna work. This threesome's gonna be me, Linnea and Barbara - and you gonna be the Lephrechaun. Don't forget your little pipe and hat.
Question from Dr Splitz M.D:
"Dear Grizz,
I noticed that The Grilled Snout has not posted a movie review since the website's brief hiatus. Is he still recovering from the Scrotal Infusion accident? I can have a nurse send over some more ointment if he needs it".
Yes. His balls are pretty busted up. Send more OINKment plox.
Question from Vampyros Lesbos:
"Dear Grizz,
Seriously, stop with the plox. It's becoming as bad as the buzzy bit in 'Start the Reactor'".
Another fucking genius. The page is called "ask" Griz but thankyou anyway for the suggestion. I suggest you remove the simpleton brain matter from your date-hole and place it back in your Pelican shaped head. Next.